Yearning

Although the definition lends itself to something you long for -- when I hear the word I think of a painful almost regretful feeling

I guess it is a longing to change things in the past and intense desire for something in the present or future

To me it doesn't sound hopeful but woeful--- like a bitter memory or experience

For sure there is passion behind some yearnings but I tend to see and feel an emptiness - a forlorn look back

Yearning represents the aching to go back - to change that result or to reach out and grab that lost opportunity

I'm not sure why I envision the past with the word yearning - it just seems to scream loss to me