good-byes

aunt alice's funeral was yesterday and with her passing came the end of an era in my family's life--

her services were not in the little frame church, that still graces the grounds, but in their new facility---not at all like i had envisioned it----time marches on--

we rode past my grandmother's house afterward and alice's house, which is just a couple of lots away----

finally the new owners were taking down the old shingles from my grandmother's house----how i wished i had gotten back in---one more time----maybe taken the old ornate space heater in the dining room---or that gorgeous deer in the snow scene front door-----if only-

i have many things from my grandmother's house---not really anything from my uncle elwin and alice though----a dear friend of alice's told me as i was leaving the church---if alice's brother didn't want all of the family(my side)pictures, she would send them to me----

this lady actually took care of my aunt alice until she had to be placed in the nursing home---she is her sister's sister-in-law----she is such a special person---her sister was saying yesterday, how she was an angel in disguise---i told her, that i didn't think she was disguised too well--

we drove past the two little frame bridges as we left the church yard----the waters always scared me as a child--and i shuttered a little as they creaked and swayed--

as we passed the reservoir, i felt that old feeling, it was cloudy and i was hungry and chilled-----i remembered those winter days--arriving at grandmother's house---the old wood stove she cooked on--the one i have now, just sitting in my kitchen---no use, just reminding me-----i could feel how i felt, as a child---how after dinner, if it were really cold and looked at all like there could be the possibility of snow--

i would huddle up on my grandmother's old iron bed and dreamily peer out those cold windows----just knowing i wouldn't have school the next morning--

my sister got out as we passed by alice's--she was going to take a picture---i rolled my window down, telling her we were going on---i had taken pictures not too long ago anyway----

we did move on and on down the road and i found myself not looking back at those waving hands ---only remembering them in my fondest glimpses of yesterday-----