Friday, December 11, 2009

reagan- our first grand-daughter

6 years ago today our first grand-daughter was born--

i remember when little reagan was born, her 2 older brothers were very sick - they even had to go to adrienne's mom and dad's to stay - so the baby wouldn't get sick--my son and adrienne were sick also--my son "t" had also been in the hospital just a few weeks before reagan arrived--yeah alot of sickness was going aroun

frank and i and our other kids at home went over to dustin's and adrienne's apartment and put up a christmas tree for them- we got to see reagan the night she came home from the hospital-she was a beautiful baby and is an even prettier young lady--she knows some of how special she is-- reagan loves to play bride--one day my daughter-in-law told me , she had over heard reagan playing bride --it was the end of the wedding ceremony --reagan playing all the parts, repeated the pastor's last words,"and now you may kiss the prize--she is <3

Saturday, November 28, 2009

brennen's birthday

tomorrow will be my oldest grandchild's 11th birthday- yeah i was a very young grand-mother (haha)

he is such a neat kid- he's very very smart and very very very sweet-
he is very artistic and musical- much like both of his parents-

i remember the night after he was born , we went to the hospital to see him again and then went to look at Christmas lights- it was so magical- grand-kids are something else- i recommend them to everyone-

i hope he has a special day and new year of his young life- i hope he stays as eager to learn and innocent to the harder things of life as long as he can-- happy happy birthday first grandchild-we love ya <3

Wednesday, November 25, 2009


hey everyone- hope all have a great day tomorrow--robyn and i just finished making some of our dishes early- robyn wanted to do it all by herself- but we managed to do it together- one day it can be all hers-

thought i would talk a little about some "special" thanksgivings-
one that comes to mind--if you remember my blog about janie, you will understand why this one was so special--we picked her up to come to our house, just for the day- we were still planning to adopt her at this point and some of our family was going to come over to meet her--i remember it was snowing that morning-- it was one of those snows that only covered the ground and trees, it was so very beautiful- we had a fire going all day and it was just a great day- a day that i knew as it was happening ,would long be a very special memory-

totally other aspect of thanksgiving- there was this one year-- our little boy, tommy had been in the hospital for a week- we came home the day before thanksgiving-- i told frank i wasn't up to the full blown day- but he assured me he would do it all and it would be fine- it wasn't- i ended up sending him to the "great american steak buffet"- he probably didn't care too much anyway--colin and kelli meet him there-- i feed the little kids- and we had lots of left-overs--frank even got the "senior discount" -which he wasn't old enough for- hahahaha

oh yeah - there was this one year, i decided to go back to making everything from scratch (i know) well i had just finished my huge pan of homemade stuffing- it was cooling on the counter- i left the room for something- i returned to find "luda" (our dog) eating the stuffing- she had almost eaten half of it--i just cut out the part where she might have licked it and served it anyway--funny the kinda same thing happened years before that- i had made my mother's famous mac and cheese- well it fell in the floor as i was pulling it out of the oven- i scooped the top layer back into the pan and called "hugo" (our dog then) in to lick up the rest-

i have lots of other fond memories, but i gotta go cook some more- happy cooking and just be thankful i didn't ask ya over my house this year- too bad i don't have a dog-

Thursday, November 19, 2009

my first born

well i am afraid i have started something, with my post about my grand-daughters on their birthdays-

31 years ago i gave birth to my first child- november 20-

he was a very large baby 10lb 4oz-- he looked so big- he was

he's the one i blogged about before - ya know the one "gatoring" on the table at school- good times-
he's also the one who thought he would love to stay a week in the mountains, with his wife and 4 small children-

i hope he is always safe and happy- he is also the actor- so i guess a wish for him to be able to still find the time to act or whatever he wants to do in that direction

we are very proud of the man he has become- there are many stories i could tell about him - i will spare him- for now

i hope he will always find the time to be with his family and take life as it comes- with much joy and contentment- if i could i would keep anything from ever hurting him as all mothers would do if they could , for all of our children-

i am so thankful he has found the perfect partner in life- i pray they will continue to grow closer and closer-

much good wishes and love go out to him and his sweet sweet family

happy birthday son <3

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

The Writer

Hi I'm Robyn, daughter of your usual blogger. I'll be blogging on something very exciting and interesting that has happened in my life recently..........meeting Earl Hamner Jr!
For those of you who aren't familiar with the name I'll give you a quick summary of him. Earl Hamner Jr. is a writer, but what he is most famous for is the beloved show from the 70s "The Waltons". It was based on his life growing up in the Blue Ridge Mountains during the Great Depression. The eldest boy "John-boy" was based on him and portrayed by Richard Thomas and toward the end of the series by Robert Wrightman. Earl has written books such as "Spencer's Mountain", "The Homecoming", and "You Can't Get There From Here". He wrote scripts for "The Twilight Zone" and "Falcon Crest" which he also created and co-produced. He has written various others scripts but that would take far too long to name them all!
Well back to my story! Daddy, Mama and I went to the Blue Ridge Mountains for the weekend. The first thing we did when we got there was visit this little country store that we visit every year. The man who owns the store is a close friend of the Hamner family(the basis for the characters of "The Waltons"). He told us that Earl was there sitting in the original house and that if we wanted to see him to just walk right in. Mama was too shy to just walk in so Daddy and I walked up to the porch and opened the door. At first we thought it was just family, so I started to walk away so I wouldn't appear nosey but before Daddy was going to close the door someone came to the door to greet us. I quickly apologized and told him I didn't want to intrude but he said we were welcome to come in and meet Earl. We stepped inside and walked into the kitchen where he was sitting on the same type of table they had on the show, a long wooden table with a long wooden bench on each side. He turned around and asked what my name was I said Robyn, of course and Daddy introduced himself. He was just like I thought he would be! Kind, charming, funny, and has hardly aged a bit! He signed my postcard I got in the store. His sister Audrey was there, she was the inspiration for Erin Walton. He said that I had her hair. She signed ,my postcard also! He talked about the time when he lived in Richmond. At that time he was attending Boatwright University(now known as University of Richmond) and living with his aunt. He was a member of St.Stephen's Church at that time. I even got my picture taken with him! Which is now my facebook profile picture.
And when I am older and am looking back on the things in my life that will be certainly one of the most thrilling experiences of my life! Earl Hamner Jr. is a person who will be remembered long after he's gone.

Monday, November 2, 2009

november 2

hi- it's been awhile- i guess i'm not a very disciplined writer lately-

well there hasn't been too much going on- my mother is getting a lot worse- some days she doesn't even know me when i call-

i've been thinking about how strange it is , when people change- when life changes- things ya think will always be the same - will always be there- go -people get sick- people have accidents- people die-
i remember my mother as such a strong person and funny- sometimes she is funny now but mostly she is just sad-

i've had to question myself as to why i have not been very sad- at times i am but most of the time, i just accept it as a part of life- recently i have been praying more for her to be healed- i mean why not - why wouldn't God decide to heal her-i think God can do anything He wants- i think we are commanded to pray for healing- not losing faith when the healing doesn't look like we thought it would-

we haven't been to church the last 2 Sundays- something important for our daughter to attend kept us away yesterday and the week before we went to see "timmy"- it had rained on saturday - that kind of visit does him little good- he loves to go outside--
even though we didn't plan to stay away from church ,to step back and think and pray - it has given us some new insights - we still want to serve God of course and we want a youth group for robyn- but we don't want to rush God -he will lead us where He wants us to be-

i have found myself becoming more and more healed about the bad things that were done and said about us at our last church- it's like who cares- i mean i have had children die- how much could any of this garbage hurt-

life is all about change and if ya don't change with it and embrace it you are the big loser- beauty is all around us if we choose to see it- maybe that is why, sometimes when i see my once strong busy mother, shuffling along ,barely knowing where she is- i see a beauty in her that was never there before and i smile at her memory-

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

our family's miracle baby

3 years ago today we woke up to a call, that our 3rd grand-daughter, our 5th grand-child, had been born-

we had not known that she was due to be born so soon- our daughter-in law , had just been to the doctor's the day before- they thought she had 2 more months-but they were wrong-she was perfect-

little dannon was the catalyst for a major miracle in our family- you might say she brought people together

she is a little bundle of energy and cute as a button- which allows her to get away with a lot - haha-

i hope she has a wonderful life- one as full of life as she is

we all have to laugh- whenever someone is bugging us or just getting on our last nerve , we like to repeat dannon's words of wisdom- "leave me alone, i don't feel good"--happy birthday little miracle girl

Thursday, October 15, 2009

hey i'm still writing

yeah haven't written in a little while- we visited another church this past Sunday- it's a pretty large church with lots of different kinds of people - it was okay - did feel the Spirit, but don't think it is the church for our family-

i had a man call me today, he goes to my old church - he is a relatively new member, only been coming a few years- that is a new member at our old church, as most people there up until recently , have been lifetime members- well he was nice - just wanted to say good-bye- he also said something i found rather interesting-- he said , one thing he could say for sure is that frank and i would not find a church with the history we had there-- very true but any time you change to something new, you have no history there-- but it made me think of what i answered him with- i thanked him of course for calling, but i reminded him that Jesus wanted us to give up our traditions for Him--

i still don't claim to have any real new insights, but do feel a lot of pressure gone- pressure i didn't even recognize i had- even about things i thought i enjoyed-

i told the man that called today that he was only the second person that has called, except for my aunt- there was this other man that was very upset about our leaving - he had actually called about something else , when i told him we had left the church, but he probably would have called anyway--

yeah , it's not like we wanted people to call and try to get us to change our minds but jeez 2 people

just to let you know us a little better and our roles we filled at our church over the years , i will list them- so you can maybe understand how we feel--out of sight out of mind--

sunday school director
adult sunday school teachers
children's church directors
drama leader and actors
assistant pastor
fall follies directors

i'm sure there are lots i am forgetting- i list these not to brag or complain- but just to show the bewilderment of our treatment before and after our departure from our church

the one man that called about something else , told us something completely laughable if not down right ridiculous- he said when 2 of our dear ladies at church heard we had left, they didn't cry, they didn't question why, they didn't even say what a shame- no they just said " well i am sure glad they won't be doing those old fall follies anymore- now that is some christian love that can only leave you warm and fuzzy all over-

Monday, October 5, 2009


well we went to another church yesterday- we had been there before- still wasn't their regular service- it was nice- but don't like the fact , they don't have Sunday school- guess more of a baptist thing--but that's one of the main reasons we are leaving--so our daughter can have more inter- action with other youth--if it was up to me i probably wouldn't even bother to go--does that sound awful--maybe--but starting to hate the worldly politics in the organized church--although i don't want to discourage anyone from going--it's fine if you don't lead anything or become (unknowingly) a threat to someone--sound like sour grapes-- no just reality--so sad it has to be that way- but as long as we are all human , this will continue--enough of this - i will go on to another point or something

i do have a peace , i never thought i would have , about going to different churches- thought i would chicken out--just hate to do things like that- and i'm not very social-- at the church we attended yesterday , it was teacher appreciation day- i knew that already- after we had made our decision to visit --well i don't know what i was expecting- i mean i signed up to win things and all- but i wasn't thinking they would call out people and such--didn't care for that but did get a walmart gift certificate, so shouldn't complain.

we will continue our quest- let ya know how it goes- if you're out there

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

just writing

well our family finally made the decision to leave our church- the one we have always gone to - i like to say i went there before i was born, as my parents are charter members--it was time

a lot of bad things had gotten in the way these last couple of years--my friend says it's way past due, our leaving and that she thinks God was trying to make us leave--probably so-

still it's going to be somewhat hard to leave the familiar and all-

kinda funny, my husband, frank was just about to call and talk to the people he needed to , about resigning different jobs, when the phone rang --it was a lady at church- she had called to tell frank that the church was replacing him as superintendent of sunday school- he had to laugh-- because we had already decided to leave

i hope we find where God wants us soon- but i have to say visiting last Sunday at a new church wasn't as hard as i had thought it would be--it's kind of exciting and freeing-

if you're reading this ,please be in pray for us --

Friday, September 25, 2009

day with grand-daughter

today i kept my second to youngest grand-daughter - robyn and i decided , despite the rain we would take her to walmart to shop and have lunch-she seemed to enjoy herself--she kills me though- she is just so funny -i don't know why, she just is--

she insisted mama and daddy had a new car- was hoping that was true, but it wasn't --

robyn and i split our usual tuna sub and little (gotta remember to ask kids if they mind me using names - i'll call her dana ) dana got a hot dog-

i got the other grand kids clothes i found on sale - there were no sizes for her so she got a light up pumpkin thing, to take trick or treating

little sideline now -- the other day i was having lunch with my son- robyn was telling him about the costume she was gonna wear on halloween--and he said -gee that's funny , mom never let us go trick or treating--i felt so bad-- it was mostly true---you see when he was little i had this big religious conviction about not celebrating Halloween--you get older, ya change- but still felt the guilt--oh well not a thing i can do to change that--

it was a nice day- dana had the most fun playing with my shells i have sitting around in different containers--seems she's stolen quite a few - according to my son --he's like- mom please don't send her home with anymore shells--and really mom,just why did you bring the kids beach glass- no we didn't let them have it--

well not much more to say-- i'm planning to go read the rest of my daughter-in -law's book she has written- can't wait--grand kids are fun- i recommend them to everyone

Monday, September 21, 2009

so i haven't written in a few part 2--and still nobody cares :(

boy it's true -writers do hit dry spots- but they say true writers just keep on writing , even if it's just a few lines a day
i remember when i wrote my first (what i consider ) real book --more like a short novel or really loonng short story--anyway- i couldn't stop writing, i would even be up in the night - it just flowed- like i couldn't stop it if i had wanted to--not so much like that lately--thinking about life too much i guess-

i want to go ahead and make the mark i was put here to make--and it may just be my mark is making sacrifices--and that's okay--if i know what they are--you read so much about doing what you are passionate about--but is that always possible--maybe not in certain times of our lives-

maybe our passions can change to something easier - passion doesn't always have to be a struggle - does it ?

why do we want to live out our dreams-but also fit in with society or i least i find my self still fighting myself this way--as the Bible says we are to live in this world but not be of it and we are not suppose to love the things of this world--but it's very hard to keep going in this world ,sometimes without the "things" of this world--

i really hate the crap i'm writing lately- but i'm trying to not give up on this stupid blog--

what if i'm on the verge of a great breakthrough- a breakthrough to what i don't know - heck i don't even know what a breakthrough would look like--or if it would mean anything if it came-"fish world "is so much easier -never mind that---one day all i will be concerned with will be -will be -well ,will be probably nothing even similar to my silly questions and concerns today--"vanity, vanity , all is vanity"

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

okay so i haven't written-does anybody care====

hi there- it's tuesday and i'm making my parents dinner again--kinda getting in a routine--making pork short ribs -broccoli rice and broccoli florets--made double for us to have--

robyn's been busy with dance so far this week - she is in the highest level --i think she was a little nervous about it , but it helps that her best friend went up also--she even got to student teach for an extra class yesterday-will continue to do so all year--she loves it -it's the little little ones- so cute-

sounds like our fall will become pretty busy- the dance studio plans some parades and performances , they haven't done before or at least since robyn has been there

pray for my family this week please- a unspoken--thanks--i don't really think it is a big deal-but why not pray- right-

my mom seems to be doing some better- she even went in the choir last sunday- she was telling everybody how she feel asleep in the choir--i couldn't find out if she slept through the choir's special- my father didn't notice --and my husband who was in the service that morning didn't either and i was in children's church--oh well -at least she made it to church--small steps--

i've got my fall mums on my porch- i was gonna get 2 yellow pots of mums-my husband said to get 1 yellow and 1 purple- he was right- then i went ahead and got a pumpkin too- i'm always wanting to get a pumpkin early, but don't - i went wild--even got a beautiful fall wreath from dollar general (love that store )

we're busy doing school and all --just thought i'd take a moment to write and stay in touch - wish you all would--

Saturday, September 12, 2009

remembering carter

this is the anniversary of my dear carter's passing from his beautiful body. he was 12 years old when he left- he is my 3rd born son--

there are of course many many things that i remember about carter- i just want to recall a few of them-

i remember how your big brothers played with you- lots- and how colin always said you were his little buddy
i remember how your youngest sister, robyn used to put make-up on you and high heel shoes-until mama saw it and quickly took them off--i don't think you minded
i remember how much you liked to have your head scratched- and although you couldn't talk - you let me know , when i stopped that you had not had enough !
i remember when you had lots of curly light brown hair - we said you looked like a little lion
i remember how - the first few years you laughed and laughed-
i remember how much you seemed to like "Aladdin" and how we decided "a whole new world" was your song
i remember holding you the night you died and thinking i could memorize your face-
i remember you today and everyday- you came at such a sad time in our lives and made things bearable-we all miss you and will see you one day--the Bible says you will have a new body, but to me i can't imagine a body or spirit more beautiful than yours-i love you carter

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

haven't had much to say the last few days--kinda in a funk ,yesterday-probably the rain

okay schools started, my daughter has started her solo for dance competition ,and i am still wondering what to do about the church Christmas play- last week i was really leaning towards doing it - had even picked some of the music out--but now....

we don't even know if we are going to stay at our church--i don't want to slam my church here, it's just a lot of things to consider--for one thing there are hardly any kids my daughter's age there. and another thing- our Sunday school class my husband and i teach , is really shrinking--i know "where two or more are gathered together.....we've been praying about it for a good while now--one reason i think we are afraid to leave ,is we are so used to it --and the fear if we stop going there we will just stop going altogether

i wish things were different but right now they are not--i wish if anyone is reading this , they will comment and give your point of view--maybe you've gone through something like this before-- i know we have--but still don't know any answers--one thing i know--if Christmas wasn't in couple of months - i'd be gone most likely--,maybe that's my answer

Saturday, September 5, 2009

my wishes for my grand-daughter on her birthday

i wish so many good things for you, it's hard to pick some to write about--most of all i wish for you a great faith -for faith will get you through so much of the things that may come along-things you wouldn't ask for , but sometimes find they were just what you needed-

i wish for you contentment and passion and of course great love --i wish you children -

i wish you good health-good friends- to stay always connected to family and those people that are important to you-

i also wish for you ,something i suspect you already have- a generous spirit-

i wish you a wonderful party tonight and the best school year ever--but most of all i wish you a wonderful grand-daughter just like you :)

Friday, September 4, 2009

school daze

as the school year is set to begin next week - i find myself thinking about things that have happened to my kids at school through the years--i am also thinking a lot about my grandchildren - and hoping this year will be a great school year for all of them--only 2 won't be going to school, and 2 of my grand-daughters will be going for the first time!

i start with a preschool memory--my second born son was in his second year of preschool--he was already having somewhat of a hard time ,since his little sister was in and out of the hospital a lot that year--one day my husband called me on the way home from work--he had stopped at the store and was calling to see what i needed--i told him and then inquired how was my son he was suppose to pick up from preschool--he said ,gotta go, and i knew what had happened--frank said when he got to the school, all the other children had gone - there was our son sitting on the floor playing- he looked at his dad and said -oh hi dad, i was worried about you--i was so so mad at my husband!

i jump ahead quite a few years to my first born son's junior year--he had a problem with one of his teachers- it was the first week of school --believe me i didn't usually call the school and complain,but this time i did--well the next afternoon my second son comes home from school ,running in the house before his brother could get to me-- he lets me know i will be getting a call from their principal concerning his brother of course ( why else would he have been so eager to let me know) --i decide i'm gonna be pro-active - i call the school and get the man that was the principal--i tell him what my son said- that i should be expecting a call--he says-- oh yes mrs. proctor, i was going to call you - it seems that your son, was found "gatoring" on a table in the "commons" in a bra and skirt-i didn't know what to say to that, i asked - just a bra and skirt--oh no it was over his clothes--thank God for that--i ask him what is "gatoring"(bad question)--he says mrs. proctor ,have you ever seen "animal house"--no i say- highly indignant! fully humiliated- i say to him--isn't it funny that i call you yesterday and complain about something and today you just HAPPEN to find MY son doing this !! --he says ma mm i had no idea who your son was until i found him "gatoring on the table in a bra and skirt--uh huh i say and hang up--a little side line to this - the teacher that i had called to complain about in the first place , turned out to be my son's favorite teacher and a wonderful mentor--the moral --wait wait wait before you call any school and complain about anything your teenager tells you--you never know if they have a bra and skirt in their backpack-

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

mountains and memories

i had a pretty busy monday and tuesday - sorry i didn't write--did anybody miss me--hey by the way where are my comments -"where's my theme music".

monday robyn and frank and i went to the mountains--my oldest son (still forgot to ask family members if i can use their names )--and his wife-the writer-he's the actor-and their 4 kids -grandsons-almost 11 and 7 and two grand-daughters ,almost 6 and 3--my son had been talking about taking their vacation sometime up in the mountains--i think he might be re-thinking that idea--

we had a long scenic drive--that's the way i always like to go -i mean what's the point of going if all you see is highway-right-. but i'm sure they thought we would never arrive, since they would have gone - if on their own , the interstate--

on the way my son calls us from behind, where they are following--dad where's the next bathroom--hahaha - we told him to go at our house where they had met us--that there would be no mc's or b k's around--so we stop at the nearest side road and into the good old woods--starting to love the great outdoors?

a few miles later we remember -oh yeah this next little town does have a Food Lion--we all cheer as we pull in the lot! my son and his wife stay in the car with the youngest and we go in with the other 3 kids --long bathroom break--gum machines galore--decisions decisions--go away with various gumballs tattoos and fake mustaches--gotta love kids-

we finally get to the mountains--kids and all have a great time - we picnic at this huge park area--just about the only ones there--keeping a look- out for crazy people though--perfect place for a massacre--i know , i always can find the bright side--i had brought a picnic lunch--sandwiches,potato chip and salad, pickles, grapes, "grape flavored apples", and chocolate donut holes--everyone enjoyed it --think we got some great pictures--
the kids -older and young, ran around playing hide and seek, picking wild flowers,throwing rocks and just having plain old fun-

on the way down the mountain there is this country store we always stop there-- we came in another route, so instead of hitting it coming up ya hit it coming down --much better to hit on way in--lots of expensive stuff and kids stuff- neat old type candy--kinda like Cracker Barrel--the kids start coming up to "pop pop"and me with like $10 worth of candy each--we settle on less--we get out of the store and the 2 year old screams (she's really tired by now!) i don't want this old candy and precedes to throw it all over the place--the 7 year old is loving this - he finds it all--good times--

it was a fun day but i do think my son realizes it would be kinda of stretch to find enough to do for a whole week -

tuesday --we took my mom and dad down to places they had grown up --mostly down in charles city va. and new kent--we had bought a little hand held recorder, for robyn to record her grand-daddy telling stories about his youth-- she loved it and i think they did ,too--my dad wanted to show robyn where george washington got married St. Peters church--my mom was very confused that day and talked a lot on the way back about that church -she thinks frank and i are going to start going to that church-- she kept saying--that's a long way for you and frank to go to church--we tried to correct her but sometimes....
when we rode up to the house on Westover plantation where my mother had grown up --my father and frank got out and went up on the property--they weren't suppose to--well mother insisted there was a lady out there with them -she even described that she had a baby with her and was wearing a heavy coat and a big hat--i wonder sometimes if my mother could be seeing dead people--my husband says she is seeing memories-either way - i do believe that through her illness it's very possible , what doctors call delusions could just be gifts--

each day can't be a trip to the mountains or a trip down memory land, but we can have hearts ready and waiting for the bonds of life--

Sunday, August 30, 2009

the little boy mannequin

i think i may have mentioned my families pizza quest--i may not have--i guess i should have looked back over my blogs--to tired --barely able to write--so i guess i will tell you about the pizza quest in case i have not.

a few years ago we would put the kids in the car -get starbucks- play our favorite music and ride until we were hungry for dinner--we did this for years--we still do it when my husband is off on a weekend night - we used to always go on friday nights--we tried almost every pizza joint in the greater richmond area--we found our very favorite was "zorba's" greek pizza - my husband also really liked "robin inn"--but the story is not about the pizza --that's just how we came to know the little boy mannequin in carytown

i won't reveal which store he is in- i've been trying to get them to sell it to me ever since we met him --he is probably from the 1940's or 50's --i just love him - although if i did get him , it would take a lot of time for me to look at him close ,or touch him--ya know the doll thing--but still i want him--i know part of it is he reminds me of one of my little angels.

the first time my husband went into the store to inquire if we could buy him, they said no--the owner did not want to sell him at the time, but did tell my husband of a website he could go to .it seems there is this site where people that collect baby mannequins ,go to show each other how they have dressed them up etc.--my husband assured them he had no interest in this rather odd hobby--but he only wanted to rescue the little mannequin, from a store window that was dressing him in things like"the ramones"t-shirt--we like the ramones but come on .

frank said he had the feeling they thought he was weirder than the dress up mannequin people--i don't think it's strange - the poor thing needed a good home.

every few months my husband calls to check on the situation--they talk to him in slow deliberate words--no sir we still are not interested in selling you our mannequin--he still tries ,for me.

so if you go riding down in carytown you may start to look for our mannequin--i hope you find it in a way--because i don't really think most people would want to buy him anyway--and if you do see him -take a good long look at him and see if you don't think he's the sweetest little mannequin you have ever laid eyes on.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

walking and dreaming

i hope this blog doesn't depress anyone--by the way my husband says i really shouldn't use the dashes the way i do--i explained this to my readers in my first blog -so if it bugs you -you can refer to that or just ignore it--sorry.

my family was visiting today ,with someone we have adopted in our hearts back in 1994--he is at the same institution as "janie" lived-- we try to stroll him in his wheelchair ,as much as we can ,when we visit--he seems to enjoy this--between talking to him (he's non-verbal) and walking there is a lot of time to think--

today i was contemplating how i might start something i've always wanted to do (purposely don't want to share it) --it sounded great and "teddy" (not real name) looked approvingly as i chattered away --who knows it could work-- i went on and on about it , until teddy started grunting his annoyance at the subject now-- we walked on -- teddy often inspires me to dream--it's like--how does he seem so happy and content--he doesn't own a house, or an apartment--he doesn't even have his own room--but yet he is happy-- not all of the residents there are happy--but teddy is--

when i see teddy i'm sometimes ashamed of how discontented i can be--life's not fair and life's not easy--yet here is someone for whom nothing comes easy but he smiles and he laughs and he forgives all the little and big injustices he has had to go through --that's one of the reasons he so inspires me ,but it's not the main reason--i don't know what the main reason is ,but when i am with him, i feel it--kinda like he might be an angel--i truly believe there are angels among us, no doubt!

most of the stuff i think i'm going to do -i don't --but every once in awhile , i find myself actually living out one of my daydreams--i wonder if teddy does.

Friday, August 28, 2009

the Christmas play

it's getting about that time of year , yes the wonderful magical children/anyone else we can grab to be in it play time of year--yes i've been writing and directing the church Christmas play on and off for over 24 years --the last 7 in a row--haven't decided as to whether i will do it this year--i know i say that every year--but by now each year i have it all written or at least the music picked out.

i like to write it , but i started writing it out of necessity--you see we have a small number of children at our rather small church--but it does seem they started coming in much greater numbers the last few years. there is much joy in doing the play--and a load of hard work . my husband who is my right hand man is the biggest help of all and one of my good friend's is always the stage manager--she provides a large number of the kids herself, and in the early years ,it was just about only hers mine,and a very few others.


lots of funny things have happened through the years-- i remember a couple of years ago i was sitting on the front row -as i always do ---i try to tell these people that a true director only observes from an inconspicuous spot in the audience--but they won't hear of it----so anyway this one year during one of the scene changes ( my friend and i actually had other ladies dressing them back behind the baptismal ) i look on stage and there is one of our few boys missing! i'm trying to get my friend the stage manager's eye and finally she sees me and shrugs her shoulders--like ,i have no idea where he is--then out he comes , costume ashew and almost at the end of the act-i was just glad we hadn't lost him--shhww

then there was the year i had the bright idea of letting them carry Christmas candles at the end of the play - as they walked in singing the last highly emotional song --well everything was going fine, until one of our kids with special needs decided it was time to wave to everyone with her candle --her candle that had a glass bulb in it--not only did she --but then her sister who has special needs also ,decided she was gonna wave it if her sister got to--and you guessed it --i saw them as they were falling , i lurched up as did others to try in vain to stop it--there was no stopping it and no stopping the numbers of other kids that followed suit--it was crazy--glass all over the stage --and did i mention the kids were barefoot--but would you believe it no one got hurt--we just played the song alittle longer than planned and out they marched each one gingerly stepping over the many broken glorious Christmas candles.

the last two years i've been so blessed to have almost all my grandchildren take a part in the Christmas play-- the first year they participated, the oldest one was 9 --well once he got to the practice he decided he wasn't having any part of nanny's old Christmas play--he sulked in the corner along with his younger brother--i tried my best to bribe him with candy and other things but he was having none of it--his brother was at the age ,he was gonna do or not do whatever his big brother was doing--okay ,okay that was fine --i look over during the rehearsal and the younger one was just blubbering to beat the band--i stopped the practice -went over to him and asked what was wrong--" i wanta be a Shepard in the Christmas play but bubba doesn't want to "--well do you want to i asked--he did and the practice went on --we even decided that older brother could be my script helper.

my grand-daughters were angels--we were pretty sure my oldest grand-daughter would be fine when it was time for she and her cousin to come in together,but the younger one took off like a bat ---- and beat her to the stage --they were so cute--the youngest of all at the time keep her pacifier in her mouth the whole time--it was adorable.

there are all ages that can be in the Christmas play--we had a wise man in a wheel chair--we've had girls as shepherds --Josephs that are maybe a foot shorter than Mary --and babies that have to be held to take a part--anyone who wants to take part can--------i don't encourage this --but one year we had these couple of families that weren't going to our church at the time--one of the fathers in the families had become a pastor--they came down the hall where they knew we met the morning of the play-to get everyone ready--the kids were so excited--i asked them would they like to have a "walk- on" as shepherds and angels --they were jumping up and down with delight--the poor new assistant pastor's wife was my costume manger that year-- i'll never forget her face as i asked her could she and her helpers get 6 more kids ready-- we only had about 15 minutes till show time.

but the very first Christmas play i ever wrote and directed--probably holds some of the fondest memories--it had just as many adults as kids --it was the first play the church had ,had in some time--i even held auditions -it was great--the night before the play we had our dress rehearsal--i was sick as a dog 103 fever aches ,chills-- i came to the rehearsal with a blanket wrapped around me--we had a party that night instead of a after party--i don't know how i was able to do it --i went home and my husband and i decided , i probably wouldn't make it the next day--all that work and time - i was so disappointed but so sick that i just knew i wasn't gonna be able to be there--my sister had the pivotal solo--well she called that night and said she had a really sick kid --she couldn't do it--just about all my family sings and entertains--so i got my husband to call my nephew and niece to see if they could fill in--i had a pretty good idea they would be busy--they sang lots at their church and others--they could do it!--the next morning my fever was gone and i was almost completely well- i made it .and my nephew and niece were thrilling - they brought the house down--at the end we had a gift bearers part of the service that went with the story of the play -- people came up bringing gifts with one hand and wiping their tears with the other--i'll never forget that play --i only wish someone had taped it --but you know maybe the memory of it is even better.

well i still don't know if i will do the Christmas play this year--but everyone should be apart of one at least once in their life.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

waiting for fall

i guess i'm pretty much like everyone - once one season is almost over , i'm ready for the next one-kinda wishing the present one away--when i was young i didn't much care for fall ,but now i have to say it's my favorite season.

when i think of fall of course i think of falling leaves and pumpkins- but it's so much more now--the glow of autumn is magic it seems- it shines with a promise of comfort and excitement all at the same time.

i love the feel of fall the smells of fall and the idea of fall-- it's the time when i start planning my "chili day" each year the pot gets alittle larger-and you have to have cornbread with it and my special baked apples--last year i was so ready for chili day , i had it in september-- think i'll try to wait until october this year--so much better when the real fall chill is in the air.

i love to go riding in the fall with a cup of "starbucks" and a piece of their wonderful iced lemon cake; it is the best!!

i love sweaters and jeans and fires in the fireplace --this will be the first fall i've had my hair red-- i think that will go rather well with autumn, don't you. i love fall weddings ,too -- two of my nieces had their weddings in fall -- they were just lovely --the colors for the flowers made everyone warm and cozy. fall is romance -forget about spring- spring is nice for young young love , but fall has an intensity of age and emotions -- it's seen life and knows life -- the song goes " the summer knows"--but it's autumn that really know us --our loves and our regrets our passions and our hopes and desires.

i enter fall with an eager heart and let it take me where it will for autumn is in my soul.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

just because i said i would

hi, i'm writing tonight because i said i would try to write every day and so far today i haven't even tried ..

nothing very exciting happened today . not that it has to for me to write. again i feel like no one is listening ,or did i share that with you here or just on facebook. i'm not really sure why it is important to me to write. yeah i want to be heard but why- what do i get from that. here i go again getting too self absorbed-- i had someone tell me today -you always make everything about you--i don't really believe they even mean what they said- who knows-but i sincerely don't think i am like that- oh well.

i know what i'll tell ya what we had for dinner -- i always like to hear what other people have to eat--we had pork short ribs --baked in the oven and barbecued -broccoli and cauliflower and red beans and rice and oh yeah devils food cake and ice-cream.

i just started to tell you a story about devil's food cake , but realized it was not the time -not on this blog.

the right timing is so important--it can make all the difference in things--like this Christmas movie i just love--"the house without a Christmas tree"-- there's this one part in it where the little girl wants to get her father to let her have a Christmas tree--her grandmother tells her to wait until after he has a good supper before she asks him- cause then he would be in a good mood.

there are so many good reasons to wait for the right moment--the trick is knowing when it is-like for instance i probably didn't pick the right time to write today - this is a bunch of crap i am writing don't think i don't know it--i just guess i wasn't gonna let my dry writing day prevent me from keeping my word to my phantom readers--if you are reading this--wow you must be very loyal--well before i convince you i am a terrible writer who has nothing to say, i will close for tonight--i could of made something up--thought about it--but how would i expose myself to my readers that way and again isn't that what mostly blogging is about--night night

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

a girl called janie

i don't know why i have decided to share this story with you, but i kept feeling like i am suppose to today. i usually try to write about something in my day or something in my day that ties in with a story in the past--but here goes

years ago when my husband and i had our two oldest sons and our first daughter, who was also our first handicapped child--we decided we probably wouldn't have anymore children, but would adopt a older "hard to place" child--we went to all the classes - where we were warned of all the problems one could encounter with some of these " damaged " children --it didn't scare us --for after all if we were doing okay with a severely handicapped child- how hard could it be--the only thing i was sure i couldn't handle was another handicapped child--they had them in fact they had a book just full of kids with special needs. the-caseworker also said that parents were needed for children that were now in institutions--they would continue to stay there but you could visit them and make medical decisions for them. i knew that was definitely not for me - i could never go to an institution let alone leave them there!

well after the adoption classes were over ,the case worker had a child in mind for us- an older girl--it didn't work out,as she very much wanted to stay in the foster home she had been in for 5 years--she was hoping they would adopt her - i don't know if they ever did.

time went by an i found out i was pregnant again . we were very happy about it , but scared that this child might be handicapped ,too. one day we were out picking up meds for our daughter from the county medical center--where we had taken our adoption classes ( our daughter had been dropped from our insurance)--- my husband goes into get the meds and returns with a large book -- the book of hard to place children-- seems he had run into the case worker we had had before. i was so mad at him--how could he have brought this book out , me being pregnant and all--he said we could keep the book for a week-- i vowed i would not even open it!

a few days later, the book seemed to be calling to me--i looked through it--there were so many --it was just too sad- i started to close the book, when i saw this little girl in a wheelchair- her head was deformed--it read about her--no one had visited her in her 11 years-- i cried -

when my husband came home from work that evening i was holding the book --i told him i had seen the child we had to adopt--he said wait , let me show you first the one i have picked-- he opened the book and handed it to me - it was the same little girl--we couldn't believe it--

we made a call the next day to our case worker in our county--we waited and waited--they never did anything to help us get in contact with the institution where the little girl lived--we couldn't get this child out of our minds and hearts--one day a friend of mine suggested we contact another non profit agency she had dealt with, as she had adopted children----
the next day i called - i told the woman about the book - which all the agencies had --she looked up the little girl--i almost dropped the phone when she said--oh yes , janie- i'm visiting her--in my heart i said thank you Lord--for truth be told, yes i felt so sorry for her , but if God had someone else that was willing to take her ,than i was off the hook--she told me no no that she was only visiting as a social worker--we decided to meet--

as i was due with my baby in a couple of weeks , we decided to wait until after the baby-so we wouldn't have to stop the visits for a time--i had my baby--another girl--she spent the first month in the nicu--it looked like she had the same handicap as my older daughter--we were crushed--but she came home - we loved her to death--and life went on-

in july that year we made our first visit to janie--she was so sweet--but i was very worried about taking care of 3 handicapped children --i knew i didn't want to be a parent to her and leave her there--of course for her , but also because it was so sad to come every week to this institution--i had never seen so many helpless pitiful people--i felt sick every time we went--eventually we became more and more used to it--the visits and the plans to adopt her and bring her home continued-

it seems the case worker (not the one that brought us to her ) from her county of birth was the birth mother's best friend--when we met with her she told me how the family had never come to see janie and how she had tried her best to convince them to visit--she was sure they never would--during that time i had strongly felt the Lord telling me to go ahead with the plan to adopt her, but that her birth family was going to come to see her--i asked janie's case worker to try one more time with the birth family--before we got any deeper into the adoption process-- she assured me that she knew them and it was no use-they did not ever want to see her-

then one day as i was fixing dinner the case worker that had introduced us to janie, called--she said janie's caseworker had called and she said are you sitting down-- her birth family is begging you not to adopt her--they want to meet with you--i was not surprised-i knew i had heard right

we were very torn--janie had many many medical problems and many services they would not provide in our home--she would have to be transported alot--i knew in my heart that if my children had her problems i would still keep them at home--but i also knew if we brought her home her birth parents would most certainly not be in her life- and i really felt janie would want them in her life

after we met with them - we felt some what different about them-- i still could not see how they could have never come to see her--but i also understood that stupid doctors had told them to put her away and forget about her--that they weren't capable of taking care of her--and really that was and is part of the system's problem --they made too much money to get any help with her at home but not enough for some of her needs--it's so messed up

after several visits with janie and her birth parents - we decided that we would not adopt janie- but there were two conditions- they had to agree to visit her every week and we would still be able to visit weekly-- they agreed --and until janie's death at 17 that's what we did -- her birth family came every saturday and us every sunday

i think of janie so often and wonder if we made the right decision --but mostly i believe we were just asked to be willing to adopt her-- God always knew the healing janie needed from her birth family and the healing her birth family so needed-- i can still see her smiling face and hear her infectious laugh-- she made a huge difference in our lives and will forever live in our hearts.

Monday, August 24, 2009

" kids say the darnest things "

i was talking to my good friend today- trying to cheer her up --she had just gotten home from the hospital, - her grandson had surgery

we started remembering things about our kids etc.-- so i thought i would share some of the better most embarrassing things our kids and kids we love have said, maybe someone else needs a laugh today

one time my daughter was having a medical test done- she was not very happy about it and became very - well let's say gassy-- we were at a catholic hospital and there was a little nun in the room with us ( for some reason ) --i turned her way and explained --yes she has some gas it seems--my son says mom mom i know another word for gas--and me with my mind on my daughter preceded to ask - oh really what is it --FART, he cries out- certainly loud enough for the people in the next room to hear and most definitely the sweet little red faced nun !

then there is another son of mine that managed to top that, one fine day at our baptist church- i was keeping the nursery with a dear prim and very proper older lady of the church--snack time arrived with it's usual crackers and juice --my darling little one exclaims--at home we like BEER with our crackers--she only smiled and nodded as i told her i didn't know where he could have got that since we most certainly did not drink

but probably one of the best worst ones came from my cousin's little girl (thank goodness) - while shopping in a very nice small jewelry store her daughter looks at the man who is waiting on her mother and then looks at her mother and asks-- mommy does he have a PENIS-- but the worst part is my cousin, not knowing what to say -- answers -- i don't know honey--

Sunday, August 23, 2009

mini vacation

i hope ya missed me yesterday--we went away saturday and came back sunday--thought i would write something yesterday morning before we left--but sometimes ,good intentions----

we went to a place we've gone before, just a little town near us-- it has a really historic downtown shopping district--pretty quaint

we decided we would just try and relax,and we did

there's a small beach area near by --we rode there and had lunch at this place we had been to before -- it has a beautiful view - overlooking the water. we remembered the food wasn't too good but the view was worth it --this time the food was great although the prices had gone up !

we stayed at the same hotel we always stay-- if we go back , i think we'll try a new place-we probably won't go back anytime soon , to spend the night, but might go back at Christmas time as the downtown is so beautiful then.

we ate dinner at a nearby mexican place-- think i've had my fill of mexican for a long while--their food was so bland--i asked for some sauce --the waitress didn't seem to understand me -- i said -ya know like ah taco bell--she brought me something--didn't help much---i saw waiters serving this large dish of ice-cream to people around us-- i told my husband we should order that --like how much could ya mess up ice-cream--seems like the dish i was seeing was a taco salad-- didn't order it.

we really didn't do much but there were moments, i know will become fond memories---riding into the town-early afternoon- raining hard, the lights that you see only at night on and sparkling-- . my daughter says - ya know , there's something so neat about this -the rain the Christmas lights (she calls them) and michael feinstien playing--told ya she was an old soul.

plan to take more of these mini vacations, for after all how many years will i be able to ride around taking life as it comes -- singing with my husband and daughter to james taylor and the jonas brothers---i know well it won't be long.

Friday, August 21, 2009


for as long as i can remember i have had a love hate relationship with dolls. my mother has a picture of me ,visiting the legendary santa at the miller & rhoads department store. i'm holding a baby doll that was bigger than me. it was under the Christmas tree were santa was, i had taken it and was toddling away with it as fast as my chubby little legs could travel! my mother said i threw the biggest fit when they had to take it away-- and so it began.

i'm pretty sure i know where my fear of dolls came from-- see if you don't think this would be kinda scary----my 2 sisters and i had met in the bathroom early one Christmas morning--probably about 3 or4 in the morning--we decided to see if santa had indeed been for a visit--we inched down our long dark hallway to our living-room- where santa always left our haul under our huge live tree---as i peeked around my two big sisters there was my doll- the one i had asked for--i had wanted a life size walking doll--but she wasn't walking-- how could she--
for there she was sitting on our fancy sofa still in her plastic bag -- i turned and ran back to my bed terrified out of my mind! how would i be able to look at that doll in the morning
but when i got up hours later, there she was out of her horrible bag ,pretty as can be-- i got to carry her to my grandmother's that day-- her name was joyce--she later would lose her leg and go to live in attic town

still today i can't go into a doll shop without someone to go before me--i'm telling ya though i think i'm normal--dolls can be very scary, i don't care what anybody says

fortunately none of this has stopped me from buying my daughters and grand-daughters lots of beautiful dolls -- and so today when i saw at wally world 2 big baby dolls on sale i didn't hesitate to get them for two of my grand-daughters birthdays--i have already got 4 dolls for 4 grand-daughters for Christmas--just don't ask me to buy them from an antique store --yikes!!

Thursday, August 20, 2009

confessions of a farmville addict

first of all sorry to any readers that aren't on facebook and don't play "farmville"--skip today's--

when i first started fb (facebook) i joined this stupid game called farmville-- i let my gifts just sit there ,and my crops all wither--then one day a friend told me how far up (level) she was on farmville and i started to get interested-- you don't win anything--you don't even get to eat your food-----you're just competing for a higher level than your farmville friends!

i knew i was in trouble when i started picking out seeds to plant based on how long they would take to come up -- i had to make sure i would be home to harvest them ya know---of course like some of my friends , if i had a laptop or phone internet i wouldn't even have to think of those things-- so actually i guess you could say i have more skill-

my husband got really worried about me when he heard me complaining about how hard it was to harvest and plow at the same time-- he just doesn't get it (remember i was once that way )

and ya know what's so aggravating-- if one of your neighbors pops up for you to come to their farm and help , oh i don't know pick up some trash or rake a few leaves-- can you believe it -- right in the middle of harvesting--what are they thinking!

now when i found one of the keys to getting to the higher levels was to get rid of all the trees and decorations and animals and just buy more crops-- i started to move on up pretty quickly--but my lowest point yet was when i only needed a few more points to go to the next level-- i began deleting my plots that were close to harvest time-- just to get more points from plowing

at least i'm not buying (with real money!) more coins yet-

yes my name is lynn and i am a farmville addict

Wednesday, August 19, 2009


remember i told you how i talked to my friend in poland yesterday--well we chatted on fb again today--i told him about my blog--while we were talking he went to my blog -- he commented to me how a certain one had almost made him cry--

it meant so much to me for someone to be touched by one of my entries

you know it's so funny how we seek acknowledgement from others--how it can make our day or change our mood--sometimes it's just easier or quicker to say nothing

even my friend (really really old friend -she'll love that-) commented about how awful my hot dog hash sounded ( it's an acquired taste!) but i didn't mind-- she's just jealous--but really it was so neat to me that she had read my blog-- gee , i hope i'm not to self absorbed!

but isn't that what the human condition ( i'm gonna get serious now ) yearns for -- to be connected , to be heard, to be understood , to matter,

thanks to those who take the time to listen to that someone who's needing your attention--who knows it just might make all the difference .

Tuesday, August 18, 2009


remember my dinner i was planning with my parents--well it turned out pretty nice--we had spaghetti, salad,garlic bread and yellow cake with chocolate icing--last night as my daughter robyn was making the cake while texting with her summer virtual boyfriend ( she actually knows him they just haven't seen each other recently ) she discovered the cake didn't take oil like the standard cake mix but took butter--it said it was yellow butter cake, but we thought that just meant butter flavored---well we used soft margarine and it was delicious!

i think my parents enjoyed themselves-- i sent home the left-overs for their thursday night dinner as they have wednesday night church supper tomorrow night.

robyn is so cute she always dresses up when we have someone for dinner--pumps and all-- i think it's so sweet--she even put pop standards on for background music--you'd suppose that would be for her grandparents, but that is one of her favorite styles of music -- she's an old soul !

mama and robyn looked at pictures on facebook of the grandchildren -her great-grandchildren!daddy and frank talked alot about nascar and " the lawrence welk show ".

my knee has done pretty well today-thank the LORD!

all in all it's been a pretty good day --farmed some on facebook's farmville and farmtown-- talked to one of my best friends sons ( haven't talked to in years ) who lives in poland ! he is also on farmtown ! .......... hope MY son feels better son --nasty summer cold- poor thing--

i don't mean to be disrespectful about my mother's illness--but life's changes also have their lighter moments ,even in tragedy---as my mother was starting to leave she was looking around picking up plates etc. as she always does ( even before some people can finish)--she looks strangely at a decorative pottery bowl i have on the end table - it has sand dollars in it--she goes to throw it away -- nobody could help but laugh- she did too-- ya know the old saying -ya gotta laugh to keep from crying--good night all :)

Monday, August 17, 2009


i am right now preparing spaghetti sauce --but the ? is why ( by the way my knee is better-probably wasn't good for it standing up chopping away )

a couple of weeks ago i decided to make spaghetti for my daughter-in-law's b-day dinner- great idea right-- not!! figured it would be easy and didn't have the money to take everyone out to eat. in comes my son and his family of 6 ready to eat. i had used a really BIG pot for the noodles-my husband almost burned himself trying to pour out the water--steam filling the kitchen till you could hardly see the grandkids as they asked--can i have garlic bread--i don't like spathti--hey nana you know what i want for christmas--and hey do you have anymore of those blue drinks--can i sit at the bar (counter,they like to call it bar ).

i thought it would be nice to put the spaghetti on a big platter and serve it home style- but first i had to get the noodles out with the tongs that were conviently in the one drawer that was stuck like nobodies business! yeah it was going great!

so that's why i said to all that i would not make the stupid mistake of having spaghetti when extra people were coming over

but here i am making my sauce for my dinner with my parents---they say insanity is doing the same thing over and expecting different results----CALL ME CRAZY

Sunday, August 16, 2009


well i'm not at church this morning because i can hardly move my left knee! i don't know what's wrong with it -but just hope it gets better on it's own ( of course with God ) because we don't have insurance!

which brings me to another point-- i'm so tired of this endless debate about reformed health care --there has to be something in between the 2 sides dumb ideas !

last night i heard this dope on fox news ( i love fox news ) saying that really anyone who was interested or wanted health insurance had it-- hello is anybody there-- my family can't afford it and i know plenty of other families that can't--what are these people talking about - it's crazy

we would have to pay 400 min. for family health ins.-- the only way i can go to my doctor for my diabetes is he charges me less than half for an office visit and even though he says he would like to prescribe me some much better medications -- he prescribes the ones i can get for $4 at walmart!

my husband (like so many others lost his job about a year and a half ago) he didn't find full time work again for 9 mos.--during which he worked 3 part time jobs. now with a full time job and a part time job we are still only making 2/3 of his salary as operations manager of a waste co.

next time i write i'm sure i will be more intertaining-- not so much complaining-- pray for my knee-- thanks--have a great Sunday!

Saturday, August 15, 2009

never a lender be

i get this call from my brother-in-law--don't see him or talk to him but maybe 2 to 3 times a year ( love him though ) . he asks me if i remember when he lent a miter saw to my husband and could he look for it when he got a chance. i tell him frank is asleep- taking a little nap before his second job. i tell him i'll call him back.

the phone had woken my husband, so i tell him about the conversation--he doesn't recall the item, and asked when he was to suppose to have borrowed it-- i tell him my brother-in-law said it was when we were working on our last house before this one--24 years ago--
my husband rants some and goes back to sleep.

i call brot-in-law back and tell him frank doesn't remember and surely doesn't know where it is now. no problem he says and describes it once more and seriously says -well when ya get a chance would ya see if ya can find it for me--sure thing we'll get right on it--

first of all my brot-in-law has been renovating a house for 20 years or so--and this is the first time he's needed a miter saw --and second how daw gon much could a miter saw cost--gotta love him!

Friday, August 14, 2009

the little boy

as i told you earlier, my daughter and i were going to lunch- we did- wally world

while we were there this woman and her son passed by - i was drawn to him- he was in a wheelchair- severely handicapped- -

i haven't told you yet but i have had five little angels like that little boy.

as they passed by , i tried to make eye contact with the mother ,but she looked away--been there--you are very aware that not all smiles or stares are kind - so for the most part you avoid the looks of interest - out of protection for your child and you.

i said a silent prayer to God that if i was to speak to them He would put them directly in my path again before we left the store. as i was checking out i heard this famaliar but different sound coming from behind me - i turned around to see one older man next in the line, but behind him was this mother and little boy. the boy was making all kinds of sounds (guess God knew i wouldn't look around without this) . i finished checking out and walked back to the woman . i told her that i hoped she didn't mind, but that i had had children similar to her son and how drawn i was to them--her son who had before closed his eyes tightly, started to open them. he looked as though he was smiling . it seemed we had talked there at wally world before,-years before- she and i remembered--seeing him reminded me of my children --i will put her and her family back on my prayer list--one of those divine appointments.


i think my daughter robyn and i are going on our usual friday lunch date. we either go to wally world and split a tuna sub, or target with rubber hot dogs !

later today i will be making cabbage, and my famous hot dog hash-- here's how i make it--get your pencils ready!
1 pack hot dogs sliced (small circles)
canned diced or sliced potatoes
1 or 2 sliced onions
oil your pan -top of stove-brown onions and dogs for awhile
add potatoes and cook till brown

seriously- my family loves it !
i got the idea from my grandmother ( mother's mother ) only she made it with lots of butter and french fries--her's was great too

i know by now my readers are becoming envious of my glamorous life, but not to worry -you too can become a super chef like me--i will continue to share the wealth--keep reading, and cooking!

Thursday, August 13, 2009

mall day

hey, today we (robyn) went to our local mall to have lunch with my son "c" --still not sure how much to tell on this blog, and if family members mind--have to ask i guess--
we had chinese food well kinda-- it was good
my son was in a pretty good mood except when i had computer questions-- old people can be so annoying !

i've been thinking (some) today about what to worry about and what to let go
when my husband and i were much younger ,it was so important to do things round the house--ya know i don't know why i just said that cause it's not true-- i should say we wanted things to look good , but always chose something else to do whenever we had free time.

still i'm looking around and trying to decide what is the least we could do--money,time and effort wise to improve our surroundings--we've started to de-clutter- which really gets messy--ya start with one room and then the other room becomes the junk room

so i decided to just go to the mall - my mess will always be there but my son may not always work at the mall.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

after the rain

i thought about not writing anymore--can you believe it --me of great confidence--but here i am--not much to say right now but felt like i should try--

i read the first 4 chapters of my daughter-in-law's first novel- i was very moved by it--it wasn't the story ( although i liked the story ) but the idea of the written word, of alittle glimpse of someone. i hope she can finish it and get published

i love that my kids are into the arts--there's my one the writer--other daughter-in-law the decorator--my oldest son the actor--my second born son the photographer--and my youngest daughter the dancer!

the rain has stopped --i used to love the rain--it made me romanticize--my husband and i would always love to eat chinese on rainy days--now i find myself feeling kinda down ( like normal people ) when it rains. -- i'll be more interesting later-- i hope--cloudy looks like rain again

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

i cannot let you go

i cannot let you go, though dirt has touched your case, though some have cried with ease
i cannot let you go, for if i did it would be done, what chance would i possess of you , what meaning could i think of that would satisfy this emptiness your leaving has caused
i cannot let you go even as all the poets and lovers and priests would tell me so , even though a thousand words of common sense should try to sway me
i cannot let you go just as an angel watches over the weak , i too must watch, for you might call for me,do not scold me for you do not understand
i cannot let you go even though my faith be strong it helps me to not let go , for your beauty did not die
i cannot let you go for if i did you might not have existed in your still small way ,so great in my soul
i cannot let you go

later on country style steak day

well i took the meal over to my parents --as i walked in the kitchen i saw my mother had the table set for 4--she was convinced we were there for her to make dinner for us ( although she hadn't prepared anything ). my father shook his head, he said he tried to tell her we were bringing dinner to them --enough for them and enough for another night-- i told her if she felt like it next week i would make dinner here if she would come -- she said she would-- we'll see--
when my father left the den for a moment , my mother motioned for me to come look out the window and see if i saw the red lights through the trees--daddy entered the room and said --that mother was just seeing things-- i wasn't so sure--don't know why--i preceded to sit exactly in the position she told me to and sure enough i saw what could have been ( from a distance ) red lights-- i gently told her it was a crepe myrtle tree--she seemed relieved

my husband daughter and i went to target --got coffee and sweets--and robyn found a dress marked doen to $4.50--we stopped by a couple of more stores--came home and had a nice dinner-- i had made double chicken the night before, so robyn and my husband frank made lima beans and mac and cheese while i rested--it's raining now --and i pray both my grown sons get home safely from work--God bless my whole family and the whole world.

Country style steak day

hey it's me -- i probably won't worry about grammar or any of the conventional writing rules--so i hope that doesn't bother anyone!
today i am making my mother and father their weekly dinner from me--i just started doing this 4 weeks ago, hope to keep it up each week. my mother has alzhemiers (sorry if i didn't spell that right too busy to look it up right now) . my father has been doing most of the cooking lately ,so am trying to give him a little break. i've been meaning to start a blog for awhile now--so here i go
i'm gonna make beef rice, butter beans and my daughter robyn is making blueberry muffins! i really like to cook esp. in summer and fall . i like one pot dishes the best. i always fancied myself a writer--for a long time--i had an article published once in a local news magazine--.
i just recently entered a writers contest --didn't win just got alot of good and bad feedback. it actually encouraged me--but i'm like that--i've always had alot of confidence in my talents--don't know why cause people in my life have not been very supportive. i do know how to write correctly but find it so boring.
i'm not sure where i will be going with this blog--we'll see ,hope someone likes it. talk later!
oh yeah did i say i was making country style steak!