i hope this blog doesn't depress anyone--by the way my husband says i really shouldn't use the dashes the way i do--i explained this to my readers in my first blog -so if it bugs you -you can refer to that or just ignore it--sorry.
my family was visiting today ,with someone we have adopted in our hearts back in 1994--he is at the same institution as "janie" lived-- we try to stroll him in his wheelchair ,as much as we can ,when we visit--he seems to enjoy this--between talking to him (he's non-verbal) and walking there is a lot of time to think--
today i was contemplating how i might start something i've always wanted to do (purposely don't want to share it) --it sounded great and "teddy" (not real name) looked approvingly as i chattered away --who knows it could work-- i went on and on about it , until teddy started grunting his annoyance at the subject now-- we walked on -- teddy often inspires me to dream--it's like--how does he seem so happy and content--he doesn't own a house, or an apartment--he doesn't even have his own room--but yet he is happy-- not all of the residents there are happy--but teddy is--
when i see teddy i'm sometimes ashamed of how discontented i can be--life's not fair and life's not easy--yet here is someone for whom nothing comes easy but he smiles and he laughs and he forgives all the little and big injustices he has had to go through --that's one of the reasons he so inspires me ,but it's not the main reason--i don't know what the main reason is ,but when i am with him, i feel it--kinda like he might be an angel--i truly believe there are angels among us, no doubt!
most of the stuff i think i'm going to do -i don't --but every once in awhile , i find myself actually living out one of my daydreams--i wonder if teddy does.