Tuesday, March 5, 2013

how long

calmly echoing now, the wind breathed a breath, like it could be it's last----she waited

the sky, was peppered with color---colors she didn't recognize----but they were stunning

should she step out into this lush paradise------was it a trap

her feet sunk into the soft, almost spongy grass like covering

she smelled something enticing yet frightening---what was the memory it brought screaming back to her senses

was this her sanctuary or maybe her punishment

after all, how long could one be content in only glorious surroundings----she was ready to discover

the hanging vines held the most perfect fruit she had ever laid eyes on and she knew she could not resist any longer

velvety juices ran down her hungry throat, as she swallowed for the final time

47 comments:

  1. Love this, Lynn. I felt like I was there. Is it about Eve? It's a beautiful rendition.

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    1. you know, i am not sure jackie--i think it kinda is ;)

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    2. I like that you're not sure.

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  2. Nice, Lynn! Very evocative. ☺

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  3. I truly loved this. I always enjoy my visits here Lynn.

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    Replies
    1. so nice to hear--thanks so much :)

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    2. You're quite welcome and I look forward to your next post :)

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  4. Wow, I envy people who can really write (like you).

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    1. you keep saying stuff like this and i just might think about believing it- haha thanks so much judy---and no need to envy---you are a writer!!!

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  5. Replies
    1. awww i'm so glad you did! thanks teresa :)

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  6. Hi Lynn,

    Its good to be here,
    I am here via this year's A to Z Blog Challenge Pages,
    I have notice that you are on board this year too,
    Waiting to hear and read about your posts at a to z
    The post is really good and a well rendered one
    I like it, By the way this years A to Z challenge is fast approaching,
    Hope you are working on it, good number of posts are aired at a to z pages as well as co hosters and other participants pages
    PS:
    I have noticed one thing that, since you registered your name for the challenge, you need to project the a to z badge at your pages and i noticed the last years badge at your page, i think its better to embedd this years badge too, you can collect the html code from the pages of a to z
    pl. embed the code at your side bar of the page,
    keep blogging
    Good Wishes
    Keep in touch
    I am
    Phil @ Philipscom
    An ambassador to A to Z Challenge @ Tina's Life is Good
    And My Bio-blog

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    1. thanks so much phil and i will put that badge up--thanks for the reminder :)

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  7. Rather a surprise ending. Did she swallow the last bit of fruit, or her final swallow.

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    1. hmmm i don't want to say--but one of your choices i had not thought would confuse--but as you ask the question, i see how obvious it is to think of either! thanks joanne :)

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  8. Very descriptive writing! Is this the story of Eve and the forbidden fruit?

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    1. i have to admit, the thought occurred to me about eve as i was writing--thanks sherry :)

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  9. I could just feel her internal struggle. Very descriptive. Lovely!

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    1. i am glad you liked it! thank you theresa :)

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  10. Such a wonderful expression of paradise, and then the taste of forbidden fruit. Lovely.

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  11. I wondered too if it was about Eve, or definitely someone that was doing something maybe they shouldn't be?

    betty

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    1. haha she probably was betty--and i am still not sure if it was about eve, really :)

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  12. Replies
    1. i really adore it too! thanks so much!!

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  13. Good night, Lynn! Put these together in a book please--your talent always blows me away and I always want to read more. And that confusion between sanctuary and punishment is so gorgeously relatable...thank you.

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    1. wow thanks meredith---you really inspire me to keep on---i really do doubt my talent, plus i am lazy--so thanks again for the great pep talk!:)

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  14. Stopped by to read this again today. May I send this out on Twitter Lynn?

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  15. She reminds me of a 60's 'beatchick' I once knew.I can still picture her running through the grassy meadow with a blanket of wild flowers.

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    1. seriously! how fun---fun times i bet :)

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  16. This is absolutely gorgeous, I'm a new fan x

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    1. oh, thank you so much and i am so happy to have you!!

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  17. Sounds like Eden to me! Beautifully written.

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  18. Hey Lynn, could be the beginning of a story, great imagery, it really pulls the reader in.

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  19. the sky, was peppered with color -- I love how this sets the tone. I love this picture of paradise!
    Damyanti
    Co-host, A to Z Challenge 2013

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