Sunday, June 3, 2012

repost-- january oh january

i was just sitting on my sofa sipping my coffee when it suddenly hit me, that i wanted to write--that i thought i had something to say-- here is what i think it is (kinda)------

january is the month of dread--also the month of endless dreams, of plans that may or may not take place----it's kinda like that list that you made a while back and crumpled the paper into a tight ball, threw it in the corner and never quite came over to pick it up and toss it, because----because maybe just perhaps, you could actually accomplish some of those crazy lofty ideas you had floating around in that autumn brain of yours--ideas that quickly lost value when compared to the heavy duty of the endless holiday, Christmas season---the list that was always there for someday


and january is that someday, today---within january's dark endless days, days where all you want to do is eat waffles and sleep on the sofa and breath in and out, till the next day passes---days when you don't want to think of the junk room that is now two junk rooms or the cloudiness that lies in the sky and your weighty head-


but alas the cold air comes at you like a dare, a dare to do something, anything--to change something, to believe in something again, anything, everything, someone--

so january sits before me and beckons me on, and whispers to me--it won't always be this way-love me enjoy me, i am only thirty-one days, don't hate me---i could have been june, would that have changed me, would you dread me any less--


so i uncrumple the paper, rub the cynicism from my watery eyes and read the thought of an eager heart, that heart of autumn--and discover the heart is the same, the list still distinguishable and i go on to trust that this january too will pass but this time i will watch as it does

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i've been busy the last couple of days so i haven't been able to write-- been in sort of a poetry mood-- not sure how this will resonate in june:)

21 comments:

  1. Very nice! That last paragraph is so true: our "Januarys" won't last forever, and we can find hope in that.

    Have a nice Sunday, Lynn!

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    1. thanks so much and yes thank God they don't last---you have a good Sunday too dana--we are missing church today and heading down to celebrate big tommy's birthday--he is still there but we are not sure if he will still be there for his june 27th real birthday<3

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  2. I think after reading this, I'll never think of January the same again :) Honestly, when the kids were in school, it seemed after Januarywas done, the rest of the year just flew by. January was also often the coldest and snowiest month when we lived in Montana so it was always good to see it go past. The older I get though, each and every month seems to fly by way too fast! Enjoy the day!

    betty

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    1. they do go by at a much higher speed, these days----thanks betty :)

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  3. I appreciate the warm June breeze even more after thinking about January.

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    1. haha me too especially beautiful day here today, susan!

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  4. The best time to write is when there is an urge as opposed to a duty. As for January it is a lovely month. Anew year and a new start. The chill breezes refresh the land scape from the sweaty summer. You have a blank canvas and life is there to make it what you can. A lot can be said for January...... besides, I was born in January :P

    Thinking the way you do you might like this though http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YnQZ5AHUk2U

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    1. oh i just looked it up-- i knew them but never knew this song-- it's pretty cool-- i liked it-- thanks:)

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  5. yes i agree--i love it when i have the urge to write and sometimes i have no clue what i am suppose to even write until i begin---and so true about january---i have a lot of ties to that month also--and yeah how bad can your birthday month be----thanks for the link--can't wait to see what it is!!

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  6. I have so many posts in my head... just can't seem to find the words lately either. I have them all written down, in idea form, here's hoping June will be better for me.... for us. :)

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  7. oh yeah i'm hoping the summer will be good for both of us-- thanks juli:)

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  8. It's perfect for June, Lynn. This, in particular, I like:

    'i am only thirty-one days, don't hate me---i could have been june, would that have changed me,'

    As I said, perfect for June.

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    1. haha yeah i thought of that after i re-posted it--thanks suze :)

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  9. I'm glad this is June and not January.


    Signed,
    Teacher on Vacation

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  10. Great how free you are with your writing. June is our January in Australia, so I very much know what you mean.

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    1. oh wow--hope it's not too bleak---i kinda got into january a little more this past one---thanks charmaine --some may say i am too free;)

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  11. January often makes me dread whether I will live up to all my goals or fail. :)
    Teresa

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  12. I have my birthday in this least popular of months- glad both of my children are June babies!

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    1. no--january is a fine birthday month---it gives us all something to focus on, lily!

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