Saturday, April 7, 2012

g is for gift

my husband frank and i have been married almost 36 years--most of those years, his gift giving has left me a little cold, to say the least--now he knows this and will not mind me sharing this---

the first Christmas we had together, we were just dating---unmarried women take note----he lavished me with dozens of thoughtful things, i had no idea that this was just a ploy----i was young and stupid---

well the years went by and i came to kinda accept this missing link in my husband, although i never completely gave up the distant hope that i could make him understand, how easy it was to get me a "meaningful" gift---

so one night as we were taking our friday night pizza quest ride----if i haven't explained that one, it may be saved for letter you know what------okay, anyway----we, more like i started the dreaded discussion of why don't we start over with the gift thing---promising to search high and low---you will appreciate the low part in a minute------for the "perfect meaningful gift"--

that Christmas i had told my husband everything i could think of to ensure that i would get my heart's desire--it could be anything that was special, to me--something that made me know he gets me, that after all our years together he knows me---knows what i like, what i dream of ---and remembers me, stopping on the sidewalk in that little town we visited and pointing out that bracelet that reminded me of my great aunt lily----how hard could this assignment be--

i even made it simpler--i told him that my parents had this spinning wheel under their house-it used to sit in our living room when i was very young---i had to have it--mama had said she didn't care---she wasn't sure of the condition i would find it in----i talked about this must have special thing, at least 15 times a week---

on Christmas eve---which is when frank and i open our gifts to each other----i was waiting for it----he left to go to his car---i held my breath----i was so excited----

he came in first, empty handed---explaining---"now before i give you your present, i want you to know, i was crawling around, in the dark, under your parents tiny crawl space, in the dirt for you"----my glee was increasing with each word of his reprimanding apology----

and then he stepped back to the porch, lifting it in----there it was--what was left of my mother's old spinning wheel---just a piece of wood, the rest of it had rotted----

i threw my arms around my husband and cried like a baby---something i rarely let people see me do----never has any object gift meant more to me---he knew me, he listened to me, he crawled on the ground for me--

later one of my best friends told me that she almost called frank and told him to make sure he got that thing--because she thought i might kill him if he didn't---but she hadn't called him---he had done it himself-

that Christmas eve we slow danced all around the living room to michael feinstein's "isn't it romantic"---i shall never ever forget it---it was so "meaningful"


64 comments:

  1. Aww, lovely story - not surprised you cried!

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  2. That's so sweet! I think I would've...yeah, I definitely would have cried too. :)

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  3. That is a sweet story, he definitely did listen to you and got your heart's desire for that year :) I remember our first Valentine's Day as a married couple hubby came home with an ironing board for me. It left me a bit perplexed as an unromantic gift but after he explained his reasonings, it did make perfect sense, LOL. I used to iron back then, LOL, and would iron my outfits for work on the floor. He thought an ironing board would be a perfect gift to help prevent that. Have to give him an "A" for thinking :)

    betty

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  4. haha you are much more understanding than i ;)

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  5. What a romantic story to share!

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  6. Oh the gift thing! My ex-husband gave me a fly-tying kit so that I could create flies for him while he fished and I was in a hot RV waiting for my orders. The first and only batch I made was a disaster, they all sunk, and they were supposed to float. Ah the stories about gifts. . .but yours was special.

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    1. omgosh--your ex is making my husband look kinda good--no offense ;)---thanks for reading

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  7. That story completely melted my heart! Wonderful. My hubby usually gives me nice gifts, and listens to my requests. But one Christmas, he had forgotten to get stocking stuffers. In his panic at this discovery, he decided to go around the house and find old perfume and hand lotion type bottles and put them in my stocking, as if I wouldn't notice!!! I was really mad at the time! Now it is one fo those jokes that we retell every so often. But I know that he'll never do that again.

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  8. I'm lucky because I have a husband who's a wonderful gift giver. I, on the other hand, can NEVER think of anything meaningful to give him (this is partially because he never WANTS anything). But this Christmas I was finally able to give him the perfect gift, a Bernese Mountain Dog puppy. I think I might take the next few years off.

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  9. That was indeed a meaningful gift. How sweet!

    Doris

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  10. 36 years---wow. That was a very thoughtful gift.

    --Damyanti, Co-host A to Z Challenge April 2012

    Twitter: @AprilA2Z
    #atozchallenge

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  11. A lovely post, and what a thoughtful husband. Congratulations on your 36 years together and counting.

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  12. Awww. Great post! I love that your best friend tried to help too. What a great friend! But, he pulled through on his own. How sweet is that!

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    1. yeah she can be pretty thoughtful sometimes too--thanks for commenting!

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  13. What a great post! I think all men have that missing link. Mine has a habit of waiting to the day of and picking up a card when I am usually with him. This year I was not feeling good on my birthday so we were not out and about, so needless to say no card or anything. So I ordered myself a few things out of the catalog... bet he don't forget again...lol
    until next time... nel

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    1. let's hope not!! thanks for reading nel :)

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  14. Great story. The best gift is just to pay attention and follow through!

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  15. I gave up the hints a long time ago! I just tell him what I want and he says here's the $$! But, I will give him credit, he surprises me with flowers every so often...just because!
    I love your story!

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  16. haha that's what i pretty much do but still love the thoughtful surprises---that's sweet with the flower, just because--love it

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  17. That's a wonderful story! I'm so glad he paid attention to what you said and you got your gift. I'm sure you'll remember that moment always.

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    1. yes it was very good he paid attention haha

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  18. awwww! mine gave me a date in a box last year, best gift so far...

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  19. oh Lynn this story was utterly romantic as well as funny (the first part about it being a ploy) thanks for sharing.

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    1. awwww thanks cecilia---haha and it was a ploy!

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  20. Gifts with meaning are the best!

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  21. Awwww! Maybe your husband could talk to my husband...

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  22. Lynn, how beautiful! My last birthday gift from my husband was a card reading - I owe you a Pandora bead! That was 7 months ago now - I am still waiting!

    I usually buy my own Christmas present, at least I get something I want!

    I can realate really well to your post!

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    1. awww that's sad---hope he comes through someday---thanks for reading and relating ;)

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  23. Lynn, What an absolutely lovely story.

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  24. A beautiful story and congrats to 36 years (and counting)! Fingers crossed for this Christmas ;)

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    1. haha thanks i sure i will need lots of fingers crossed ;)

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  25. How touching, glad to see you finally got through to him, this story is a great reminder not to take our loved ones for granted. Happy Easter!

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  26. thanks rch---what a nice thing to say--happy Easter to you too :)

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  27. Amazing story! Thanks for sharing with us. We men aren;t so hard to get through to. May take some time, but we come around.

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    1. haha time is the truth thanks stephen!

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  28. Lynn,

    Thank you so much for stopping by my blog. I love this post! Thank you for sharing your gift.

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  29. Good job in the husband training department! Me and my husband struggle with gift-giving, but these days we are more happy getting for our kids and other relatives. We have so much 'stuff', we really don't need or want more. My favorite gift is always books.

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    1. haha i try--i know i just love to buy gifts for people, that's why i don't get other people not getting into it---yeah books are my husband's favorite!

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  30. That is an amazing story. I don't think anyone has ever crawled around in the dirt for me.

    Thanks for sharing this!

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    1. haha thanks--it was probably the only time for me!

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  31. What a sweet story. I'm glad your hint dropping paid off for you!

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  32. What an absolutely wonderful story. Thank you for sharing it!

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  33. This was a touching post and I liked it. It only takes a little time and observation to get a gift that means something. (of course it was different for your hubby, but he crawled in dirt for you, that's going beyond)

    Read the post above as well!

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    1. thank you very much and i agree, to me it doesn't take a lot of time to try to know someone!

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  34. That's wonderful that he finally caught on. Bonus points for crawling around in the dirt!

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  35. hmmm yes i guess he should get bonus points--thanks ;)

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