prom confessions

i don't think i will be posting anything new until probably monday unless i just can't help myself!

tomorrow is robyn's testing and then the prom and then good old mother's day--i think we have already been over this haven't we--

do you want to know something else about me--and in this day and time, it is kinda embarrassing --but i have never been to a prom---you see now days---it is like the thing to do---and it's like you have missed out on one of life's moments, if you don't attend a prom at least once--

back in my day, it was not cool to go to prom--at least not in the group i hung out with---not sure what group that was---i was part of the theatre group--but i think some of those kids went--but i was on the fringe of several other groups, non of which, would have dare darkened the halls of a school prom-----it was like a rite of passage to not go------

a little history---i was in a school the last two years of high school, that had just experienced the first and second year of school busing---things were not all that calm at the school i attended--i was even beaten up once by a girl at that----it was turbulent times and racial tension was at a fevered pitch---still i wanted to be there, not really at school but in the midst of history in the making---i was given the choice of going to a private school like my brother did---but not a chance----and i wouldn't take any of it back--i think-

i have recently joined a facebook page, for alumni---i don't know too many people on the page but have reconnected with a few ---i think most all of the people on the page would have most surely been at the proms----most of the members are from years ahead of my years at school--had i been a junior and senior at another time in history---i may have several bad pictures of bad prom dresses to remember too and maybe an old corsage pressed in a book somewhere --


 i hope robyn will enjoy her prom as much as they seem to on glee and other tv shows and in many peoples distant recollections of those days for them-----i don't think i have ever really grieved the awful fact that i missed all of my proms----and you know something i have never thought of--i wonder if my mom missed me not going and not having the fun of picking out the perfect prom dress----sorry mom-----and happy mother's day to all of you---have a great weekend<3

it's all about me

good morning---i started searching through my old posts to find one that was more on the lighter side of life---since my last couple have been pretty heavy---most of the posts i thought of using, required other readings to make sense-----so i decided to just post a post about myself----

i just saw this piece on the news last night---the jest of it that i took away, was things like facebook twitter and i am assuming blogging too, are all a part of our bragging on ourselves---evidently, bragging releases things in the brain, that are pleasurable---i have never considered myself a braggart, but they say, even wanting to give your opinion, is a form of bragging--

well that stupid theory is not what my post is about, it is about me---get it hahahaha

i am known through-out my family as the wolf caller---seriously, i do a mean wolf call--

i am an adventurous cook--as far as stews, casseroles and soups, go---i will try different things with ease, and even take them somewhere on the first try-

i used to write music and sing, way back in the day and turned down a career, as i was supposed to open at one of our local concert places, for, i don't even remember the group--it was some new group, the talent agency, i worked for, represented-i guess this was kinda bragging hmmmm--that stupid theory-

i am only giving random thoughts of things about myself--they certainly do not represent any importance in their being listed or their order-

i can spot driftwood from any distance, and no matter that on second look it turns out to be dog poop--

a friend and i will one day write together, what i have always known will be a best seller--"love don't buy no tires"-

i have been known to go in a dressing room and try on a hat that was meant as a door decoration---try thinking of what you would say, when you are in the dressing room and you hear people snickering, and then you read the tag--that the hat is indeed a decoration for your front door---you exit, with something like---"i was just trying to hang it on the clothes rack in there, to see how it is going to look on my door at home"---yeah no one notices your sudden hat hair----

oh and one important thing, not really about myself, but one of the most important pieces of advice i can give one-----if you are threatening, oh i don't know, someone, like the cast of a play that is to open in a week and the actors, actually believed you, when you said they could read their parts---they not realizing it was a directors ploy to nurse them along in their confidence----

back to the great lesson---if you are leaving, get to that door first and make your dramatic exit----don't let the cast one and all (except one poor soul who wasn't fast enough)--make a mad dash and leave you in a utterly useless, director's huff--

big tommy

today i do not feel particularly inspired to write, but guilty if i don't-

if you are a long time reader of my blog, you may remember a blog about a boy named tim and how we have been visiting with him since 1994----his real name is tommy--we actually call him "big tommy"--since i had a baby boy named tommy when we met big tommy---

big tommy lives in a state institution--i am not sure how long he has lived there, but most of the workers believe it has been most of his life--he is in his middle forties, although he looks like a teenager----tommy is in a wheelchair and is severely disabled-

we had been volunteering with the institution since 1989--we started with a girl named jaime--she is in a much earlier blog also and her name was changed  then to "janie"----we met big tommy while visiting with jaime one day--

jaime was in the hospital one time and as we were leaving the complex, i told my husband frank, i felt we were to go in the regular unit, where jaime lived and volunteer to stroll other residents around--sing to them and just cut up and make them laugh while getting some fresh air--

to frank's surprise, the workers allowed us to do it---that was before the "hippa" law-----so we started coming every weekend to visit jaime and any others they would bring to us----big tommy was one of them-----i believe part of tommy's diagnosis is autism---but one day he purposely met my eyes, with his sky blue eyes and did a little wave---we knew at that moment, he was ours in our hearts--


forward to a few more years maybe ten or so--the hippa law came---that law may have done some good in some situations, but not where we volunteer----most all of the residents have no family involved and no one hardly ever has a visitor---so it was they who were punished, as they could not speak up and tell anyone, that they would like us to keep visiting---

fortunately, big tommy's mother, who no one had ever met and never had come to visit tommy, signed for us to still be able to visit tommy--

this past Sunday we went to see tommy--we were informed that they were being shut down, due to state budget cuts, by the governor---they thought we had heard--we had not---they told us, that the next time we visited, tommy may not be there--that other residents were already place else where---

as i understand it, all residents are trying to be placed in their county of birth---now don't misunderstand--i think that would have been wonderful if they had done that with each one in the beginning---but most of the resident's only family, has been the workers at the institution----

we are hoping big tommy's mother will be asked to sign for us to know where he will be--otherwise, we will lose contact with him forever potentially and that is too sad a thought for us at this time--

i believe big tommy lives in the moment and i know he will adjust, but something better has to be done with our disabled and mentally challenged population-----

by the grace of God i kept all of my angels at home with me---but for many reasons, one of which, people cannot get any help sometimes, if they keep their love ones at home---people are choosing to institutionalize their family-----i make no judgement except please please, just make a visit now and then---

so today's post is another sad one, and for that i ask you to forgive me---i just had to share this, in hopes that, someone might read it and know something to do---in the mean time, could i ask you to pray for big tommy and all of the other residents and workers at southside va. training center--thank you <3

reflections-a to z challenge 2012

 when my daughter-in-law  the writer and fellow blogger told me about the a-z challenge, i wasn't sure i wanted to do it--after all, sure i have always considered myself a writer--but hardly anyone else did---that has never deterred me too much though---so i said okay, it sounds kinda fun-----

and it was-i found myself looking forward to each day, especially the comments and feedback, which i am not used to getting--it was intoxicating and pushed me on--as a writer who rarely writes anymore unless inspired and tormented until i do, i knew it would certainly be a challenge for me to write every day---but then again i knew that just the thought that i was suppose to write every day, did inspire me in itself to write-

at first until probably letter p i wrote each day--then as i had times i would not be home during the writing week, i got smart and wrote ahead---although, for me that made me feel a little weaker and kind of a cheater---not that there is anything wrong with writing ahead, it was just me haha--

the challenge left me with a much larger following than my little wonderful 8 followers--i am so thankful for each and everyone--

this challenge gave me a much larger respect for all of the struggling writers out there---as i am lazy and am not actively looking to be published------

i have since followed so many new blogs, all of which have been such a blessing and i look forward almost everyday, to check them out and see if they have posted for the day--

sometimes i don't comment though, if i feel like i don't know what is going on out there--as i am learning so much about the writer and blogging world-

i thank each and everyone that created this wonderful blog challenge and look forward to joining you again in april 2013

happy writing to you all<3

 

He will destroy death forever. Isaiah 25:8

(this is re-posted from two years ago-- and as i was looking for something this morning-- seeing this post again made me know i needed to share it again-- this little boy has never been found-- his name is kyron horman-- i'm assuming God had me post this again for prayers)

on facebook i usually put up a bible verse from an old devotional by Max Lucado- most all of the time i go by the days date- as i did today june 21--

right before i went to put my verse up this is what happened-

i was watching a report about a 7 yr old boy who has been missing for 2 weeks- i have heard about this little boy all along- you probably have also- he disappeared from his school-

each time i hear of the story i stop and of course pray for him to be found-
today with so much time passing- i begin to think he is most likely dead--but as i prayed i begin to cry ( i believe in the Spirit) i asked God to let the family find their little boy no matter what had happened to him--

i suddenly felt that God was reminding me that He could do anything He wanted and change anything He wanted--
i begin to pray-"God you know just where this child is and even if he is dead, even if someone has mutilated his little body- You can put him back like he was and make it as if it never happened--why you can raise from the dead of course"

i cried as i was being touched by the Holy Spirit to continue to pray- i felt this awesome power as i have felt from time to time-

a friend today had put up a verse the one about not letting ourselves be conformed to this world--everything was coming together--God was telling me to let Him strengthen my faith--

of course the devil was saying to me--okay well why didn't your God heal your little children-why doesn't He command that they be brought up out of the graves they are in--

i knew that i don't have to have all the answers are even any- i just needed to ask in faith what God was telling me to ask at this time in my life-and to believe for this young boy that it was still possible for God to bring a miracle to this family-

i think most all christians know this but sometimes i forget what kind of God i have--i believe that there are angels all around that we can't see and i believe that God is hoping each day that we will allow Him to give us the faith to see miracles--
they don't have to be a certain kind of miracle- just to know that God is in control and that to us good or bad, nothing happens without God allowing it--

so when i read today's verse and how the commentary also talked about a boy being called back to life -i knew that God was telling me to keep praying and believing-that He was right there beside me and He could do anything in His plan and even change His mind if that is what He wanted to do--and also that death was not to be feared but to trust Him--and not to think He doesn't know the pain of these parents or any other parent here on earth who is experiencing great pain and loss--

i pray for this dear little boy to be reunited with his family-and if this is not what God chooses to do, i pray for God to give them a great faith and the great Comforter<3

okay so this is how i got her back

okay this is how i got her back

if you are a follower of my blog, you may remember my story for the letter “w”---

after that blog, i had many comments wanting to know how i got my sister back, from the washing machine incident----now i will tell you a couple of the ways--

first i must confess, there was some tension already in place, as i- believe it or not-was not the perfect little sister, all of the time---

one little offense has stayed with my mean old sister for years—why, she brings it up every time we are together, if there is birthday cake--

you see as a child, everyone always had the lovely birthday cakes with the beautiful icing roses---well everybody knows, you just go ahead and eat them---but not my fastidious sister, no she saved hers----

once when she wasn't home, those delicious roses called to me from her room inside the little jewelry box, inside the tiny cardboard box, where she thought she hid them so cleverly----well this is pretty predictable---they were not even that good tasting any longer---as a matter of fact, i had to choke them down-----

as i recall, she pretty much choked me that evening----

back to the wmi, as it will be referred to from now on, because i am lazy----

well i thought and thought, for what seemed like months, as to what hideous thing i might repay my dear sister with---i had it, but could i pull it off----oh boy did i-

there she was, all prettied up waiting for her handsome date---i think it may have been their first date—that is what i choose to remember------well she steps out of the front door—giggling as he held the door for her--- blushing slightly as he helped her with her all too preppy" tally ho" sweater--

and there i was, she looked across the porch at me, with a look, like---yes i am lovely am i not and don't you just wish you were me--

that look was all it took—any reluctance on my part, to do the horrid deed i was about to do, left me in that instant--

i pulled up the garden hose and blasted her until she dripped, just like i had that fateful day in my adorable candy striper uniform-----dripped she did, in front of her stunned boyfriend-----

i don't really have a clear memory of what happened next---i may have blacked out—-as i remember it, she did end up going on her precious date-----but i had won—--and no matter what awful, life-threatening thing she could do to me, --nothing could  dampen my warrior's win!

after the challenge, the challenge of may

hey hey hey----yep i am sitting here writing--the day after the a-z challenge---not really knowing what i want to say but knowing i want to write---hmmmm maybe that challenge did do what it was probably intended to do--

i am kinda stressing about the month of may--now i know, hold your excitement---

i think may may be my busiest month, right there after good old december---

first there is mother's day----now let me es-pound on my feelings a little on mother's day----I HATE IT!

sorry, just had to get that out-----now don't hate me or decide i have lost my mind-----i will share, some, not all of my deep reasons i hate it------

as an adult my first memories are of being pregnant with what would become shortly there after mother's day, a miscarriage----

then there was the mother's day my baby was still in the nicu-

there was one mother's day that it's  memory  i cannot share now---

but these and many more are some of  the reasons, i do not care at all for mother's day-----and this one will be the first one without my dear mother--



i am not a downer type of person, so i will get to the other may business ---- robyn's GOLDEN birthday, my son colin's birthday and my daughter-in-law kelli's, and my youngest grand-daughter's second birthday this may---

there is also robyn's end of year testing for homeschool, and her prom------


all of this takes time and lots of money----any of these family members reading this-----don't be offended---if you know me, you know that if there is one thing i like to do, it's buy gifts for people-----i am just ranting today----and trying to keep up my blogging-----some people actually think i am serious about all i blog about----

gotta go for now and start a list for the week----i love lists and checking the things i have accomplished off---

i had a really funny thing i was ending this blog with--but in order to not upset anyone, i have decided not to share it---see that is what holds me back from being a serious writer, i cannot be honest-------and i am not fond of writing fiction----

 hey i forgot one thing about the month of may----my birthday